The Weight of Life
Each time I’ve attempted to tap dance over the keyboard in the last two months, I’ve stalled. Hesitation coupled with fear. How do you write about the weight you’ve been carrying? How do you encourage others to push through their challenges when you yourself are facing one you had never dreamed a reality? And why (you might be asking yourself) is this the subject of a CrossFit blog?
I have learned countless lessons since beginning this sport. I’ve drawn inspiration from the people breathing heavy next to me, from the flutter of footsteps on the pavement as we run, and from watery snow angels we leave on the floor, a display of hard work, grit, and challenge. But I’ve also crumbled. That’s right - I’ve fallen apart so quickly onto the floor beneath me that for an instant, my breath is fleeting; time stands still; and I search for normalcy like a lighthouse sending signals to a boat on the sea. It is in these moments the lessons I’ve collected over the years surface. It is in these moments that I am able to see real strength and resilience.
Over the past two months, here’s how those lessons have walked with me:, and re-grounded me when I needed it most:
Brain: The barbell feels so heavy today.
Heart: But, my dear, you’ve lifted and carried much heavier than this. You are so much stronger than you know.
Brain: Everyone saw me fail that lift. Everyone watched as I finished last.
Heart: But, my dear, you stood back up and tried again. You didn’t quit on yourself. And they didn’t watch; they cheered.
Brain: I have no appetite, but I know I should eat.
Heart: Yes, my dear, you should! Food is fuel for all the hard things you do.
Brain: I’m sore, achy, and just plain unmotivated.
Heart: And so maybe, my dear, we take some rest. Let your body and mind reset.
There is something so incredible about realizing your inner strength. Oftentimes, I don’t think we create enough room for ourselves to actually name the strongest pieces of our character. CrossFit gives us the unique perspective of strength from not only the weight we put on the barbell, but the way we approach and carry the different weights of life. We’ve all been able to carry heavy things, and some of us have been carrying such heavy things for so long. Do you know how much strength that requires? To carry the weight, and yet, move forward?
Failure is an inevitable part of this sport. But how many of us just simply give up? Rather, we try - albeit, we might try and fail ten times. But, we try. Do you know how much grit and determination that requires? To fail often, but to fail forward?
Food and rest is a fuel for us - not just in the gym, but for life and longevity as well. And in moments where the weight of life gets too heavy to bear, we often revert to “easy” foods, skipping food altogether, or doing more in the gym (because we heard somewhere that “more is better”). But, if we can stay conscious about seeking out nutritious food, and eating heartily, and giving our bodies the time and space it requires to rest, then we are in a better place to honor what our bodies can do for us. Do you know how much discipline that requires?
There are so many good qualities within us already…have you given yourself permission to collect those lessons and see those qualities? The four walls of the gym have taught me the space I take up matters, the confidence I carry is rooted in progress and measurable achievement, and more importantly, its taught me that I’m stronger than I could ever imagine.
As we wrap up July, and head into August, I encourage you to pause and consider what you know about yourself that is new, refreshing, or just….resurfacing as a reminder. When the weight of life becomes too heavy, just remember how strong you truly are.
What will that look like for me during the second half of our Olympic lifting cycle? I’ll trust my percentages. I’ll remember that mechanics and consistency win, every time. I’ll remember that I’m not trying to out lift the person next to me; I’m trying to out lift myself. And finally, I’ll remember to walk up to the barbell during test week with power and confidence. Because all that weight I carry outside the gym has simply prepared me to carry the weight in the gym even better.
Let the lessons in, crew. They won’t disappoint.
As always, I’ll see you at the gym!
Hugs,
Coach Kady